But a deeper question lurks beneath this debate: are these services making you a better or worse version of yourself?
On social media and character, by Cal Newport.
A freeing principle to adopt in the social media world:
Having a reason to maintain presence on a particular social media platform does not mean that you should maintain a presence on a particular social media platform.
Everyone has reasons to stay; not everyone should.
The City of Dallas reacting to the fact that the entire city has been doing some spring cleaning during Quarintine 2020.
Taken as a whole, the (Book of Common Prayer) is the ritual celebration of the seasons of our lives from birth to death in the light of the gospel.
Frank Griswold, in the foreword to Go In Peace, a small book on the Art of Hearing Confessions.
If we're the time's lords
If we’re the time’s lords, we don’t determine when to celebrate feasts by looking at the phases of the moon. Paul goes apoplectic when Christians submit to the “elementary things” in the heavens (Gal. 4:8-11; Col. 2:16). As time lords, we have authority to decide when and how to celebrate. We must organize time obediently. We can organize time well only if we have the tunes of creation and redemption running in an endless loop through the ears of our soul.
Peter Leithart, Theopolitan Liturgy
The Pagans said 'Look'
They said ‘Vide, look! How the love one another.’ They did not say, ‘Aude, listen to the Christians’ message’; they did not say ‘Lege, read what they write. Hearing and reading were important … But we must not miss the reality: the pagans said look!
Alan Kreider, The Patient Ferment of the Early Church
The Roman Empire was “(almost) infinitely tolerant” of a variety of religions. Christianity, on the other hand, is rooted in a historical and exclusive truth claim about Jesus of Nazareth. Faced with these two realities, Kreider asks “Why in such a world did Christianity attract converts?”
His answer is that, in part, it was the embodied patience of the Christians that made the faith attractive. Christian behavior—how they buried their dead, care for one another, the poor, and orphans—was “deeply unsettling” and yet eventually attractive to their pagan neighbors.
Leadership is often a matter of failing people’s expectations at a rate they can stand.
Ronald Heifetz
As a priest and school administrator in the midst of the COVID pandemic, I think I agree…
On using email as email
At my best, I try to use email as its namesake suggests it should be used: as an electronic mailbox.
As technology advanced in the 20th and 21st centuries, and the smartphone transitioned from an executive novelty to the norm, very few of us—including myself—stopped to ask whether this was actually a good thing. We can access email 24-hours a day on our phones, but should we?
Are humans the type of beings who are able to flourish when we are never truly disconnected from our work?
I would suggest that we are not. I know with certainty that I am not.
My tendency, like most of us, became to use email as a slower version of instant messaging. I had email access on my phone and on my computer, and each of these devices notified me the instant a new message arrived. I then replied as soon as I possibly could, often feeling as though my work was not finished until I responded to every new email that arrived. This, as you can imagine, led to a sense of never feeling like I was “off-duty.” I am not alone in feeling exhausted by the “always-on” approach to email.
(See Fortune Magazine’s article “How Checking Email After Work Is Burning You Out” or read the results of one of studies it references: ”Anticipatory stress of after-hours email exhausting employees.”)
I am now back to trying to use email as an electronic mailbox.
Like my actual mailbox, I may check it occasionally throughout the day if I am expecting important information. Otherwise, I will likely only check it once or twice. This means that I no longer have email or internet access on my phone.
You cannot really disconnect from email after-hours if you have any possible way of accessing it on your phone. iOS 10 allows you to delete the native Mail app and disable the App Store and disable Safari. I could not break my email-checking habit without making it impossible annoyingly difficult to check email on my device. You might need to do this as well.
But what about…?
Several but what abouts almost ruined my endeavor to use email as email. Here are some ways I have talked myself back into it.
If someone needs something from me immediately, they can give me a call. If they do not have my phone number, then I am probably not the person that is best equipped to handle their emergency.
If you are thinking, “I would love to do this, but my industry does not allow it,” then I would suggest two things:
(1) I thought the same thing; you are probably wrong, or (2) You are right, but I imagine you can find a way to limit the “always-on” email mentality to regular work hours.
How to Stop Loving Your Phone
Becoming detached from my phone and off-hours email access started well over two years ago. The list below represents the gradual progression to where I am today. (Notes in parenthesis are updates based on changes since the list was first written.)
- Disable all push notifications except Phone and Messages
- Remove native Mail app plus Gmail and Outlook apps (iOS 10 allows you to do this through Restrictions. It helps to have a friend/spouse create a restrictions code for you.)
- Install Moment App to see just how much time you spend on your phone each day. (iOS will now do this for you.)
- Remove Social Apps (I have since deleted all my social media accounts.)
- Disable Safari access via Restrictions
- Disable App Store access via Restrictions
- Remove all apps from first screen.
- Black and White screen via Accessibility options. Thanks Billie.
- Permanent Do-Not-Disturb mode; allowing phone calls and messages from a very short list of people to buzz my phone.
- Remain committed to redoing many of these as they creep back in over time.
Number 10 may be the most important item on the list. The creep back is real…
You should try it. I can help if you ask.